Meet my new friend, Mr. Rocky Red:
He is so exciting! My reaction to this gift was a bit embarrassing, but hey, you gotta appreciate what you like.
Misunderstood is an understatement in the state of your mind above the statement of mine.
Remember how I announced dipping myself in color? A while back, I got some bright paint for the body and bright clothes to try on. Today I wore a hot pink top. Wearing a black one right now. The hot pink top made my skin crawl. It irritated me. It changed my mood for the worse. This black one feels like home. This black one is giving me peace. If I am wearing colors, they must be dark. There is no shade of pink dark enough for this one. Hey, it is what it is, right? I tried. In my opinion, as long as you can say you tried, it doesn’t matter how you failed your words. Maybe someday that choice will turn upside down. You never really know.
Really didn’t want to be the one to point it out, but Pitbull and Chris Brown stole from “American Dad!” and the F.U. … N scene. That song stemmed from Stan.
Pitbull’s rapping is so special to me, by the way.
I’m a hard worker, I’m far from the boss
But when it’s said and done, I’m owning it all
I know you just think it’s just rap
Just this, just that, haha, right
Often casa gampo, who would’ve thought de que
Down in Key Largo, you know I’m on that sticky
Icky, icky, icky, icky
Don’t do it much, but when I do, I’m gone
Oh, Pitbull, honey. It’s all about overwhelming quantity and no quality, isn’t it? Maybe he should try dressing his rhymes nicely like he does his body, not icky sticky like melted caramel on safari.
Tried this tonight:
Didn’t do it Mexican style; it got done lazy-cooking style. However, the instant I opened the package, I knew that was great texture for your nachos like in the picture. It didn’t drop out like a soggy ball of meatless ground beef. You give it a try if you can/want.
Her: Which one of these dresses looks better on me? Help me choose.
You being nasty: The yellow one doesn’t work for you at all because yellow doesn’t look good on your skin, you’re too short for that type of long dress, and you shouldn’t wear something that makes it so obvious you’re almost flat-chested. The green one is good for you because it’s shorter, gives you a curvy chest and your wide hips aren’t so noticeable because of the black waist. What were you thinking when you got that yellow one?
You being honest: The green dress looks better on you because green matches better with your skin tone, and also the shape of that dress flatters your body better than the yellow dress. The green one would be the better choice for you, I think.
Let’s not get it twisted.
Ten helpful thoughts a girl could apply today along with nail polish:
1. This will turn out great.
2. No matter what happens today with my body, my soul can feel a nice Sunday.
3. I’ll try to make someone’s day a bit better.
4. A little time in the park might feel good. Maybe I’ll feed ducks and a goose while at it.
5. I’m finished with one hand. It’s looking good.
6. The nail polish on the left hand is always looking better because I’m not a lefty. I can do this anyway.
7. Maybe I’ll create a new thing… anything that won’t be born until I make it.
8. I’ll smile when I get up and make eye contact with myself in the mirror. That’s always cheerful.
9. I realize I didn’t fall in love with you; I fell in love with how I loved you.
10. Yay, it did turn out great! I had to believe it. Now it’s time for that promised smile.
Will you do ten for feet?
X: My urine is always very dark. It’s totally normal.
Me: That’s because you rarely drink water. Mine is always light, sometimes totally clear. This morning it was shockingly dark. This whole not sleeping deal is killing me. I should get offline and go take a power nap before everyone else wakes up.
X: No, don’t go yet! Light piss is not normal. I swear mine has always been super dark and I’m fine. You should worry when it’s light. Your body is working better now.
Me: Are you trying to convince me dark pee is better to make me stay or are you trying to convince yourself light-colored pee is bad because yours is never that?
X: Hey, did I ever tell you I’m a private pilot and you’re not?
Decided to try another thing. This could go three ways:
A) So glad I got this. How was I not aware of it for so long?
B) Cannot believe I got this crap. Was I on drugs when I placed the order?
C) This isn’t my order.
We’ll find out once it arrives.
Update: A! *Two Thumbs Up*
Do you check the holes of an unfamiliar salt shaker? As a guest eating somewhere new and craving a bit of salt on your food, do you grab the salt shaker and generously pour the salt without checking the size of the holes first? Are you one of those people that gasp when they realize the different salt shaker has holes bigger than the familiar? The time that happened to you, did you think you should have checked the holes or did you criticize the size of them? Should you watch for it or should it be the right body everywhere?
By the way, I really like sodium. My organs demand it every day. Can’t do it with olives. Yuck! Pickled cucumber? Yesssssssssssss, keep them coming.
Someone I know played this video for me yesterday.
She’s been a hardcore Adam Lambert fan since “American Idol.” Went to her first Lambert concert experience. She’s seen him a few more times. I remember he danced really well. Oh, and Orianthi did her awesome thing with the guitar that night.
P.S. His song “Sleepwalker” is my favorite.
P.S.S. I mentioned two juicy talents that have not been getting enough kudos.
Went looking for a recipe and found this picture from Shiraz, Iran.
Hey, check out the rest of that entry.
Are there things you can perceive the exact same way throughout your years? I mean… can you get a Coca-Cola today and see it the same way you did the first time you were given a Coca-Cola? If today you think of the first time you had one, it’s not the same right there. It’s simply a Coca-Cola, though. The next time Coca-Cola comes to you, this annoying post will be a part of you. You will not perceive Coca-Cola the same way you did before it, aware or subconsciously.
“Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” comes to mind. See what happened there? Next time Coca-Cola and I cross path, I’ll think of this and that.
How many times did I write Coca-Cola here? Now I’m all horny for a bottle.
Life’s changes manage to change your perception without your permission. It can be happily for the better or sadly for the worse. Either way, it’s going to happen. Can’t be the only one who is a bit bothered by that. The wheel of my mind will steer however life goes, and I will never be able to 10 to 2 drive it.
Thought today about how there should be a special jail for women who persistently try to steal away men. The jail should be filled with mirrors because that type of narcissism needs mirror like air. You don’t want them to die out quickly. You want them locked in for a long time and make them feel the pain they created for others, away from men, away from real connections they don’t deserve. Maybe you can let that woman have a camera to take pictures of herself, print them, make a photo album for the one she kept trying to make hers, and then not allow her to give it to him. There should be a special jail for the type of man that welcomes that type of evil and carelessly feeds it attention, ignoring the outcome.
This isn’t a terrible request. On some lands, those selfish whores get stoning as punishment.
Let’s see what you got.
THAT is how you do fortune-telling? It’s like the fortune cookie nowadays. We used to get “You will find adventure this week” and now it’s mostly “You have a deep love for art.”
Is it too blurry? It goes:
You are frank and very outspoken and sometimes unintentionally hurt others’ feelings. You are faithful, dependable, and conscientious. To those you love, you are devoted and have their deep and sincere affection.
Found it in the random section of Target. I read a few pages, man… I read a few pages about other peeps. I sho’ did.
Asked for this combo years ago.
Ay, Dios mio!
I went to a Josh Groban concert a long time ago. He was hilarious! It was like a comedy act with sensational music. Trouble is that I can’t know for sure it was all about his jokes making me laugh that hard because I had so much alcohol in me. It was a wild mix, too. There were two beers, martini and a bit of red wine. Was Josh Groban really that funny? No, yeah, he is a funny one. The whole room was cracking up! Were we all that drunk? No, he is funny.
Not feeling like an empty person.
Every now and then, you might find people complaining about demons that are strangers to you. You might want to help those people. You might realize at times it’s only a personal matter. You might feel warm gratitude in your chest.
My kid cousin was playing foosball with me, all being adorable, trying to find out what I’d want to get for my birthday in his not so coy cute way, and my answer was “tea” as you could have predicted.
You know what I’d really like for a birthday? Someone baking me a vegan cake, making me green tea, and going “TADAAAAAA!” No one has ever baked me a cake. I know it won’t happen this year, but maybe for the next one if I’m still around, I’ll have that caring adult who will volunteer to bake me a birthday vegan cake without hearing my wish. Let’s hope big like that.
P.S. I really like foosball. Foosball, Tetris, Chess and Backgammon are on top of the game list for me. It has to be rough foosball, though. Don’t play foosball with me if you need it to be all calculated, gentle, calm and shit. No, we got chess for that peace.
I applaud curiosity, not intelligence. It doesn’t sound like a brilliant path to you, does it? It’s my way. It doesn’t have to affect anyone else. Intelligence to me is soulless technicality. Curiosity happens through passion for knowledge, the desire for Universal exploration, oozing warmth in every question. Intelligence without curiosity is a set of letters and numbers. Curiosity alone is able to burn intelligence’s formula. There is the power of brain and there is the power of mind. Guess which works for intelligence and which for curiosity. Guess which is the ghostwriter of your story.
Amy’s Kitchen’s vegan soup is the only canned soup I get. However, the other night I opted for on sale variety that did not turn into regret.
Finished this one a bit ago:
It was gooood!
Had this one the other night:
It was good! Liked the kale one better because I mean come on… it’s kale. Bow down to the kale.
They have food for meat lovers, vegetarians and vegans.
Now here is my most favorite Amy canned soup:
It’s the magic of fire.
Hey, look, I know many would enjoy this one:
New name game and invitation for participation:
Do you wannaaaaaa plaaaaaaay…
It requires two players, alcohol, a bathtub filled with cold water, handcuffs, a lost compass, and plenty of two-sided trust.
It’s a board game with people stuck in traffic, we all sit and whistle, cuss, sing songs, and the one who finally loses his cool ends up losing the game.
It’s a board game filled with puzzles to solve. You exercise your brain pretty good.
We take pictures of us giving that dentist smile, demand the kids do the same, post those pictures on Facebook, Instagram and wherever else, and we find out if we won once we finish going through the other people’s happy e-portraits to compare how much more or less they got liked. The fact that people close to us know about our hell won’t affect the points. It’s an online game.
We hit each other in the head with these plastic hammers and we keep at it until our eyes start playing games on us, then the first one who sees dancing stars flashing will shout the name “DANCING STARS!” and that person is the winner.
“Against the Wall”?
I’m really in the mood for a quickie against the wall.
This one is about the times you want to try something not cliché with good intentions only to realize it sounded better in your head.
I have so much cum in me for you, you have no idea.
Your inner beauty is bigger than your nose, I promise.
Your feelings are important to me when they are negative.
When you really clean your house, it all actually looks nice.
There are times I look into your eyes and can’t feel anything.
Your failure doesn’t mean you can’t accomplish smaller tasks.
You blow my mind better than any other who blew my anything.
You can count on me being there in case you can’t find another for support.
I admire how even though you eat big like my father, you look tiny like my mother.
Dinner was delicious! You should take a break from cooking and order in more often.
Your lipstick is not whorish; it goes very well with the rest of your makeup and outfit.
Music is my escape. I love it when you sit next to me, play the guitar, and I forget where I am because the music took me somewhere better.
Don’t listen to others judging your narcissistic ways. If you like your ways as they are now, you don’t have to try making yourself a better person.